A domestic abuse survivor has spoken out about her experience of violence and control during pregnancy after her former partner was jailed for 27 months.
The 28-year-old offender pleaded guilty to intentional strangulation, assault and criminal damage. He was also handed a 10-year restraining order.
In a Victim Personal Statement read aloud in court, the woman described the lasting emotional impact of the abuse and her determination to stay strong for her child. She said: “If you can hurt me while I’m carrying your baby, you have no business being part of our lives.”
The survivor described how the abuse affected her during pregnancy, leaving her feeling judged and isolated. She said she felt criticised as a parent before her child was even born, adding: “Not for my actions but for someone else’s… made to feel like I was in the wrong.”
She also spoke about the emotional toll of verbal abuse, which affected her confidence and wellbeing. “He would gag as I walked past and make me feel so insecure… to the point that I wore baggy clothes and didn’t show my bump around him.” She added that she now finds herself watching others in public, “admiring dads who appreciate their pregnant wives.”
The victim/survivor said she was increasingly isolated throughout her pregnancy. “He left me on my own, stopped coming to appointments, banned talking about my pregnancy in the house and would threaten to walk out if I spoke about anything to do with the baby.” She also described financial control, saying she was left in debt after covering household costs while her former partner contributed inconsistently. “I have debts coming out my ears… I’d have nothing left from my monthly wage.”
Since the offender has been imprisoned, she said she has felt a significant change in her life. “I have felt more loved since he’s been in prison because family and friends have stepped in.” She described how she had previously felt isolated in her own home, adding: “I lived on constant eggshells… wondering if he would come back from work and speak to me or if I would get ignored for hours.”
Despite ongoing challenges, she said she is beginning to rebuild her life. “Everyone has said I’m like a completely different person now… I didn’t realise how depressed I was until I was out of the situation.” She added that while the experience will stay with her, she is focused on healing and moving forward. “This will be something that will affect me for the rest of my life but I just want to move on and heal as much as I can.”
The survivor said her child has been her source of strength. “My strength comes from my baby… I will fight every second of every day for his safety.”
Local Crime Investigator Maria Doyle, from the Melksham Volume Crime Team, praised the survivor’s resilience. She said: “I have worked with this victim/survivor for the past year to bring him before the courts, and I know that at times she felt like giving up. I am so proud of her.” She added: “She showed immense resilience, and we achieved the best possible result for her and her little boy.”
Anyone experiencing domestic abuse is urged to seek support. Residents can report concerns via Wiltshire Police or access specialist support services including FearFree and the Paragon Team.
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